to Hive being
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What is Hive Being, and Why the Name?
You have likely heard talk of a hive mind, where one global mind finds more or less figurative expression in various local minds. Such talk is common enough in nature documentaries, especially ones concerning ants or bees, and in sci-fi programs. Take that notion, at least a loose version of it, and broaden its scope. That will be a decent first step in understanding the title I have chosen both for my Blog and for the first five-volume installment of my magnum opus Made For You and Me, a fragmentary collection of minimalist stanzas from 2016 to 2020.
In alignment with Spinoza (the 17th Century Rationalist to whom I devoted my doctoral studies), I view reality in its totality as a grand hive Being: all entities are but pulsating manifestations of the buckstopping fount of everything, an ultimate being we might call “God” or “Nature” (so long as, out of respect for the capital “G” and the capital “N,” we limit it neither to some anthropomorphic cloud father hurling lightning bolts nor to mere wilderness untouched by human smog). According to the hive-Being view (where reality is one lone superorganism, a monistic—and we might even say unividualist—conception I defend in both my creative and academic capacities), each non-foundational being (each being, that is, whose essence does not involve existence) is an utterly necessitated expression or eruption or exudation of this eternal source—each is, perhaps better put, a mode or manner of being, and so a focal point through which is disclosed, what classical theists sometimes call “being itself” (ipsum esse subsistens): the realness of the real, the being of whatever may be, the sheer activity of being, the very isness of whatever is. This Blog, which duplicates my Substack, throbs as but one among many literary unfurlings of this self-necessitated foundation, this supreme wellspring, of which we—like black holes and broken beliefs, like fractal ferns and flickering flames—are the inevitable stylings.
My Journey
I am an academic who found himself pressured into early retirement by the rising tides of cancel culture. The illiberal scourge of censoring, silencing, and shaming—although always with us throughout our evolution—reached a local peak around 2021. That was the turbulent year my creative pursuits, which the old left once encouraged as a healthy outlet for the stresses of a childhood steeped in poverty and illiteracy, drew the ire of the new safe-space left. A small cadre of self-proclaimed victims and their allies, several of whom continue to berate me years later under pseudonyms as see through as their sexual infatuation, sought to erase me and my heterodoxy. They found support from a wannabe-woke dean, covered in the grand inquisitor robes of our decadent modernity (full-body tattoos) and just itching to signal his commitment to protecting “vulnerable populations” from triggering material (even if just, as it was in my case, off-duty poems “unbecoming for someone calling himself a teacher”). Although I eventually won my due-process case with the help of The Foundation for Individual Rights and Expression, I slunk away from a college that turned its back on protecting freedom of expression and from an institution increasingly intolerant of intellectual diversity.
The wrecking ball to my too-comfy office in the windowless ivory tower came with a silver lining. From the ashes of my professional aspirations rose a phoenix of increased freedom to fulfill the literary calling I have pursued for decades. Reputation concerns never stopped me, even within academia’s sterile halls of conformity. Indeed, my unapologetic defiance, which has long baffled friends and family, no doubt chummed even safe waters—almost as if I were asking for it all along—until the cancel shiver grew too frenzied to hold back its blind thrashings. But now, now I piston the most forbidden territories of human thought with no longer even a twinge of conscience. The newfound freedom means extra time to hone my craft. When not assisting special-needs communities (a day job far more rewarding than freeway-flyer drudgeries), I pursue my literary mission with Dionysian fervor.
Call for Co-Conspirators
This space, my digital sanctuary, showcases the fruits of my mission. Think of my posts, even those linking to my publications, as works in progress. I want your input, unflinching brutality included. Each post begins with an invitation to action: “Let’s workshop this [draft about x, y, z].” Your contributions, whether through public comments or my contact page, help hammer scraps of ore into polished blades fit for magazine publication.
Your input is valuable, even if you are neither a writer nor a reader of literature—twin disciplines dying by the cyber nanosecond. Sometimes—even if at the risk of uttering banalities—an outsider’s fresh vantage can pierce the veils of convention to reveal what insiders miss. It often takes an outsider to make us even think to question our ingrained presuppositions and attitudes. I stand by the hygienic value of contagion. That is one reason I advocate so strongly for intellectual diversity and freedom of expression. And that is also one reason I was so harrowed by the anti-diversity swell of cancel culture in academia (an institution that should be the utmost caretaker of such values)—harrowed especially insofar as that swell masqueraded under the gaslighting guise of “diversity”).
You will witness the breathing evolution of my writings over time. To track these changes, I label each revision by round: “ROUND 2,” ROUND 3,” and so forth. Each piece undergoes continuous refinement based on your feedback and my own revisitations. Sometimes changes will mar the work. That is the risk of creative tinkering as a finite creature. I hope you will alert me to missteps. After many semesters of university writing workshops, one rule has impressed itself upon me: when someone senses a flaw, something almost always needs to change—even if, yes, the proposed solution misses the mark (which often it does). From a quick look into the archives, accessible here, you can see how much I have benefited from your feedback so far.
My Hope
Sharing drafts can be daunting. But showing you the ravaged and unperfumed real deal unfiltered by makeup (stuttering starts and falsities, awkward line breaks and clumsy word choices, grammatical errors and misspellings)—that not only makes my work more relatable, but helps me refine things through your input. I hope the unfiltered look at the raw process of fumbling, rather than just the polished product, also helps other writers develop their craft. Imperfect works often instruct more than perfect ones: whereas the perfect ones tend to have a grace by which they slip inside us without activating our scrutiny, the imperfect ones—especially the near perfect ones—show us glaringly what not to do.
People laugh at me, seeing—in my tilting at the windmills of literary excellence—a Don Quixote clunking around in Arthurian armor in a post-knight era. I am not naïve. I am well aware of the diminishing ability to read, let alone well: slowly and deeply, with gratitude. I am also aware that my style, which often nests subpoints within larger points, never waters down virtuosity for the sake of mass appeal. I watch readers stumble over my sentences, unable to unlock even just the music of the envelope let alone the semantic meat within, which—given my tendency to flashlight through the darker facets of human nature (the addicts, the miscreants, the abusers among us)—only adds an additional alienating layer of difficulty). Beholding these depressive scenes of even supportive family members getting bucked off my syntactic bronco makes me feel like a dinosaur who should get a hint and, if not succumb to the brain rot of skibidi-toilet speak, just hang himself already. Even though the decline in linguistic background and grammatical voltage makes my compositions seem quixotic in a world binging Netflix and TikTok, I persist—raging against the dying of the light—by some internal compulsion to celebrate the richness of language and thought.
My hope is that, despite social media’s unparalleled power to farm our attention, people never forget the unique power of writing. Beyond unveiling hypocrisy, teasing out complex implications, and detailing the commonalities between even the most alien phenomena, writing offers something we need today—trapped in agoraphobic cyber bubbles only thickened by the Lyme dangers of forests and the COVID dangers of cities—perhaps more than ever. Granting us rich access to the first-person perspectives of others (to how things feel to them), writing serves as one of humanity’s best tools for combating loneliness. It allows us to linger, broadly and deeply and at high resolution, within the inner lives of others in a way that other arts can only suggest.
What to Expect
My work spans a broad spectrum: from metaphysical discourses on free will and determinism and the ontology of holes to the ephemera of western culture (whether the childhood impacts of the hypersexual mono-image of black woman as squirting twerkers or Terrence Howard’s sham revolution of mathematics). Some tight and minimal, others free-flowing sprawls; some heady and abstract, others emotional and imagistic—my inkwell musings, which often blend scholarly rigor with a dark humor from both high and low culture, aim to capture the visceral intensity of our personal and social and ultimately existential predicaments.
By no means can I deny that drug abuse, sexual assault, and the tales of the broken and the damned loom large in the tag cloud of my work. My writing will never be a paradise of easy truths and comforting lies. It will challenge you, provoke you, and at times even repulse you. I offer no apologies for the monsters I unleash. They are as much a part of us, at long root scared rodent mammals scurrying in the shadows of dinosaurs, as our noblest aspirations.
But make no mistake. It is not all downer darkness. The archives are my receipts. You will find pieces exploring the pursuit of authenticity in a media-saturated world, the search for meaning in an indifferent cosmos, and the celebration of beauty in both the sublime and the profane. I locate much of my inspiration, in fact, in novelists like Dostoevsky and poets like Ted Kooser—writers unafraid to pursue moral agendas or risk Hallmark sentimentality in an age that often sneers at sincerity.
Be they satirical dissections of modern social dynamics or poignant poems about addiction or academic articles on moral responsibility, my goal is to provoke thought, evoke emotion, and foster meaningful dialogue. Fear has not and will not stop me from challenging humanity’s fundamental taboos (like bestiality and cannibalism) or self-reflecting into the dark chaos of the subconscious, even if that means exposing the Jungian shadows—the inner Goebbels—lurking within us all!
Expect posts each day, no day missed. Donations are welcome, but I impose no paywall: it feels wrong to charge for art, especially given our date with obliteration. Feel free to explore what amounts to, at the time of writing this, close to a thousand pieces of poetry and prose here. That should give you a sense of what awaits.
Join me—specula holstered—on this literary odyssey into the public and private nooks of the hive Being. Let us navigate the labyrinth of creation together, confronting our demons and even slaying our darlings if we must. Let us dance on the razor’s edge between the sublime and the profane in pursuit of an elusive literary perfection never to be confused—as it has been confused in our declining civilization—with the pursuit of popularity or likeability over truth.
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Posts
Kooser
"Kooser" critiques a prescriptive approach to poetry championed by poet Ted Kooser, who argues that the poet's use of the “I” should only reflect true experiences, and not fictional or imaginative projections. This notion reflects a broader trend, particularly in contemporary literary and cultural discourse, that restricts authors from exploring identities or traumas they have not personally experienced, with an emphasis on authenticity tied to firsthand experience. By aligning Kooser’s rule with the recent societal expectation that white authors write only white characters, the poem argues that such constraints create insularity and diminish empathy by narrowly limiting imaginative reach. Kooser’s rule, intended to safeguard readers’ emotions from “undeserving” poets, is depicted here as building restrictive “walls” that prevent a deeper engagement with the full spectrum of human experience and empathy. This limitation reflects a prevailing trend in our era where “trauma must be time-stamped and notarized,” as if the legitimacy of one’s empathy or insight were contingent on personal history and verifiable experience.
By labeling Kooser a “corn-belt poet” and invoking the imagery of “parochialism,” the poem suggests that his rule is grounded in a provincialism that may resonate within certain cultural or geographical contexts but is out of step with the universalizing power of art. The poet’s skepticism of this position implies that true empathy arises not from “laureate walls” confining poets to their lived experiences but from a freedom to traverse the spectrum of identities, emotions, and traumas through the poetic “I.” Ultimately, "Kooser" serves as a critical meditation on the current literary landscape, where notions of authenticity, identity, and authorship risk constraining creative expression and reducing the power of empathy to mere biographical constraints.
poetic authenticity, empathy in art, Ted Kooser critique, literary restrictions, identity and authorship, trauma representation, parochialism in poetry, imaginative expression, contemporary literary trends, restrictive poetics
Boxing Academy Oracle
“Boxing Academy Oracle" explores the evolution of a seasoned coach, renowned for his exacting, often brutal approach to discipline, and the subtle transformation that occurs over time as his style shifts from severity to mysticism. In the first few lines, the coach’s reputation is immediately established: he is “legendary over decades / for mortifying knit-pickery,” a figure whose intensity and relentless critique served as both a formative and intimidating presence for his trainees. This “mortifying knit-pickery” is no mere gruffness but a calculated attempt to “toughen them up,” suggesting an approach rooted in traditional values where resilience is built through exposure to rigor, even harshness. The coach’s influence, which spans decades, is portrayed as almost mythical, elevating his persona to one of legendary, near-unapproachable authority in the gym.
As the poem progresses, however, this ironclad methodology begins to erode. The poem notes that his once “iron fist dwindled,” and rather than attributing this to any newfound wisdom or gentleness, the poem attributes it to “fatigue.” This shift underlines the human toll of time, implying that age—rather than philosophical change—has softened his approach. Yet, even as his energy fades, the coach’s role transforms rather than diminishes. In his waning years, he becomes a “koan machine,” dispensing cryptic wisdom more akin to Zen riddles than structured instruction. This transformation evokes the journey from a hands-on, methodical approach to one that is more abstract, symbolic, and enigmatic. In this capacity, he becomes an oracle, an almost prophetic figure, whose words are valued not for their literal guidance but for the mental space they create for his trainees to ponder their own paths.
The poem then contrasts this shift in the coach’s demeanor with the attitude of his trainees, who now enjoy what the poem calls a “no-stakes reprieve.” The coach’s “ungraspable oration” provides a safe distance from the rigors of critique, allowing them to engage with his words as a form of detached amusement rather than as a source of scrutiny or pressure. By referring to his instructions as “koans,” the poem places the coach’s once hard-edged persona in the context of Zen teachings, where paradoxes and ambiguities encourage introspection rather than straightforward compliance. The trainees, in their youthful vigor, egg him on, not out of genuine engagement but for the relief from the intense standards he once imposed. There is irony here: his former lessons required physical and mental rigor, but his current teachings provide a sense of freedom from those expectations, allowing the trainees to revel in his musings without the pressure to live up to the discipline he once demanded.
Ultimately, "Boxing Academy Oracle" reflects on the evolution of mentorship and authority over time. The poem portrays the shifting dynamics between mentor and mentee, highlighting how time transforms both the teacher’s message and the students’ reception of it. As the coach ages, his words no longer carry the weight of strict instruction but serve instead as a kind of open-ended wisdom, reflective of his own acceptance of the limitations of time and human effort. The trainees’ response to this transformation speaks to the broader notion of how we, as a culture, revere but also re-contextualize the wisdom of our predecessors, particularly as they transition from roles of active guidance to figures of contemplative reflection. In a setting as intense as a boxing academy, where physical prowess and mental toughness are typically valued above introspection, the poem presents a nuanced portrait of aging, resilience, and the delicate dance between authority and vulnerability as one approaches the inevitabilities of human frailty.
boxing coach, mentorship, age and wisdom, cryptic wisdom, toughness, fatigue, discipline, authority, transformation, enigmatic teachings, student-coach relationship, Zen koans
Crisis Center
“Crisis Center” explores the fractured attention and isolation of someone in psychological crisis, juxtaposing her fleeting connection to the external world with the indifferent clinical processes around her. The poem opens with her “pupils shiver[ing] doorward,” suggesting an initial, almost reflexive reach toward the presence of another person as the man enters, presumably a mental health professional. Her reaction hints at a desire for connection, but this potential relief quickly dissolves, displaced by her intense “chest-heaving distress.” This distress, physically manifesting in her breathing, conveys the depth of her emotional pain, suggesting a suffocating anxiety or despair that leaves little room for coherent thought or stable connection to her surroundings.
However, as her attention snaps back into herself—her gaze decoupling to a “thousand yards, infinity’s blank”—she regresses to a detached, inward state. The phrase “thousand yards” evokes the concept of the “thousand-yard stare,” associated with trauma and emotional dissociation, where one seems to look through their immediate environment rather than engaging with it. This visual distancing, often indicative of severe mental strain, underscores her sense of alienation and separation from reality, which may result from the repetitive or numbing effect of clinical interventions that lack true personal connection.
The man’s action—flipping through her chart—is imbued with a “terrible automaticity,” a detachment that mirrors her own blankness. This clinical ritual, devoid of empathy or deeper engagement, only reinforces her isolation. By focusing on the physicality of the gesture, the poem highlights the unfeeling routines that can pervade mental health care settings, where patient interactions risk becoming mechanical. Through this brief moment, the poem critiques how, in crisis contexts, professional detachment and procedural rigor can unintentionally contribute to patients’ sense of invisibility and detachment from humanity.
Ultimately, “Crisis Center” is a poignant portrayal of the disconnect between those in emotional turmoil and the often impersonal systems meant to aid them. The patient’s initial reach toward connection—quickly aborted by her automatic withdrawal into “infinity’s blank”—and the professional’s procedural response expose the hollow space between crisis and care, where both patient and caregiver remain isolated within their roles. In capturing this tragic misalignment, the poem questions the adequacy of institutionalized responses to deeply personal suffering, suggesting a need for more human-centered care.
crisis center, mental health, emotional detachment, clinical indifference, psychological distress, thousand-yard stare, trauma, healthcare critique, patient-caregiver disconnect, human-centered care
A Drowned Thing Resurfaced
“A Drowned Thing Resurfaced” delves into the complexities of vulnerability and the inadvertent power of invisibility, exploring how physical “ugliness” can paradoxically grant access to hidden truths. The poem’s opening lines reveal a figure who, perceived as powerless, finds herself in a unique position—people around her are unguarded, freely sharing their “secrets” and “eureka insights” without the usual self-censorship. Her perceived lack of influence or significance creates a space where others, likely unconsciously, reveal the raw, unfiltered thoughts they might otherwise guard. This position renders her a confidante by default, not by design, as though her perceived lack of social capital provides a metaphorical “lock-and-key diary” quality—she becomes a repository for truths rarely spoken aloud.
This dynamic positions her presence as more meaningful than any formalized therapy session. Unlike a therapist who consciously guides conversations, she receives others’ revelations in an unstructured, “free association” manner, where spontaneous, deeply personal disclosures flow unimpeded. The term “hemorrhaging out” implies an overwhelming, almost involuntary release of inner content, underscoring the often uncontrolled nature of these revelations. This unintentional intimacy hints at the idea that, ironically, her “ugliness” makes her more attuned to the genuine, raw aspects of others’ personalities, allowing her to occupy a crucial, if unacknowledged, role within her social landscape.
Yet, the poem subtly gestures at the cost of this position. The phrase “almost as much as would / remembering she is there” suggests a tension between her role as a vessel for others’ thoughts and the near-erasure of her own presence. Her “ugliness” allows others to be raw and honest, yet it also makes her virtually invisible in the process. This dynamic underlines a paradox of human interaction: those deemed unthreatening or insignificant by societal standards often end up shouldering the emotional weight of others’ vulnerabilities, existing within a space where they are both essential and disregarded.
Ultimately, “A Drowned Thing Resurfaced” speaks to the unique role of the invisible observer, drawing attention to how societal judgments about appearance can inadvertently forge a channel for honest communication. The poem critiques how societal judgments around beauty affect self-perception and interpersonal dynamics, questioning what is lost when people are both drawn to and blind to someone’s presence. In capturing the transformative potential of “ugliness,” the poem suggests that value can emerge from invisibility, granting access to unguarded, authentic human moments.
invisibility, societal judgments, vulnerability, physical appearance, human interaction, lock-and-key diary, emotional weight, unguarded communication, authenticity, unfiltered thoughts
Full-Bodied Crookedness
Full-Bodied Crookedness delves into the psychological and physical ramifications of the narrator's obsessive self-perception, capturing the relentless pursuit of bodily symmetry and the attendant sense of futility. The poem addresses themes of body dysmorphia, anxiety, and the intersection between the physical and existential, offering a layered exploration of self-image that spirals from an early awareness of physical imperfection into a broader, all-encompassing fixation.
The narrator's awareness of his physical "crookedness" begins early in life, specifically with his nose. The metaphorical comparison between his nostrils' asymmetry and "Luke and Jabba"—characters symbolizing the moral and physical extremes in Star Wars—immediately sets the tone for the poem. This exaggerated contrast between good and evil, hero and grotesque villain, symbolizes the narrator’s perception of his own bodily imbalance. His desire to "reset the set point" through American-style overcompensation reflects a cultural critique of perfectionism and the extremes one is willing to pursue in the face of perceived inadequacy.
The poem moves from local observations about the nose to a more militaristic obsession with other features, as the narrator scrutinizes his face with increasing intensity. Weed enhances his paranoia, opening him to a deeper "panoptic facial horror." The imagery of his face collapsing "like a November jack-o-lantern" suggests the fragility of his self-perception, as if his identity, like a decaying pumpkin, is subject to irreversible forces of decay and deformation. His bodily interventions—stretching his mandible, warping his jaw—become ritualistic, yet they never succeed, as the face "oozed back home," an apt metaphor for the inescapability of one's essential physical reality.
As the narrative continues, this obsessive compulsion expands beyond the face. The "imperialism" of his interventions broadens to include his hairline, where he begins shaving away parts of his scalp in the hopes of masking the crookedness. The poem’s use of terms like "imperialism" and "campaign" evokes a military strategy of control, underscoring the narrator’s self-destructive attempts to conquer his own body. Yet these interventions only worsen the problem, revealing a deeper tension between perceived self-improvement and the worsening consequences of obsessive control.
The moment of realization on the carpet, when the narrator notices his legs are unequal, marks a turning point where the body’s crookedness infects the core of his being. His compensatory behavior of standing with one foot on a Bible—symbolizing the weight of moral and existential struggle—speaks to the spiritual and psychological burden that accompanies his physical preoccupation. His overcorrection becomes metaphysical, suggesting that his sense of misalignment is not merely physical but reaches into the existential. The line “infected his code” ties bodily asymmetry to a deeper systemic failure, one that encompasses both mind and body, leaving him trapped in an endless cycle of perceived flaws and failed fixes.
The poem closes with a resignation to fantasy. The idea of a “supercomputer” iron-maiden that could force his body into perfect alignment illustrates the dark fantasy of a final, ultimate correction—a violent, mechanistic process that reflects the narrator’s underlying desire for order at any cost. The imagery of the iron-maiden—an ancient torture device—emphasizes the brutality inherent in this quest for bodily perfection, suggesting that the narrator’s desire for symmetry is itself a form of self-torture. His triumphant exclamation, “Take that, bitch!” conveys the ultimate irony: the victory, even if achieved, would be hollow, a victory over a body that resists being reshaped by sheer will.
In its entirety, Full-Bodied Crookedness is a meditation on the psychological toll of body dysmorphia and the lengths to which one might go in the futile pursuit of physical perfection. Through its grotesque imagery, militaristic language, and existential underpinnings, the poem captures the obsessive, self-destructive nature of perfectionism and the deep existential anxiety that often lies beneath.
body dysmorphia, obsessive perfectionism, self-image, physical asymmetry, existential anxiety, self-destructive behavior, body fixation, neurotic self-perception, American perfectionism, grotesque imagery, body modification
What If He Had Known About Beta Blockers?
What If He Had Known About Beta Blockers? explores the tension between artistic performance, anxiety, and the role of neurosis in creative expression. The poem's title directly references beta blockers, a class of drugs often prescribed to help performers manage anxiety by reducing the physical symptoms associated with stress, such as trembling or a rapid heart rate. In the context of the poem, the speaker speculates about how the subject's life might have changed had he known about this medical intervention, suggesting a possible escape from the overwhelming mental chatter that impedes his saxophone performance.
The poem opens by portraying the "intrusive mind chatter" of performance anxiety as a force that obstructs the subject’s natural "saxophone brilliance" from achieving the "flow states" necessary for consistent creative output. In psychological terms, a flow state is a mental state of full immersion and focus where an artist’s creativity flows effortlessly, without the interference of self-consciousness or doubt. However, for the subject, the invasive thoughts brought on by anxiety create a blockage, cutting off access to this peak creative experience. The saxophone, an instrument known for its association with jazz—a genre rooted in improvisation and spontaneity—serves as a symbol of this interrupted potential, where anxiety kills the opportunity for artistic freedom.
The poem then shifts to how this anxiety paradoxically "shoved him into poetry," a medium where neurosis is not a hindrance but a source of creative power. In this medium, his anxiety transforms from a murderer of expression to a "midwife of magic." The metaphor of a midwife emphasizes the idea that, within poetry, the neurotic mind gives birth to something profound, rather than stifling it. Poetry, in this case, becomes a space where headiness—intense self-awareness or overthinking—is not only tolerated but celebrated as a tool for creating meaning.
The poem further uses the metaphor of "a whistling sphincter" to emphasize the absurdity and rawness of neurosis. The "whistling" represents a form of uncontrolled, involuntary expression, something grotesque yet functional. This image, while jarring, captures the unpolished nature of creativity born from anxiety: it is not smooth or refined, like the flow of saxophone music, but instead rough and filled with the unpredictable quirks of the mind.
Ultimately, the poem asks whether the subject’s creative path might have been different had he been able to quell his anxiety with beta blockers. By posing this hypothetical, the poem raises questions about the relationship between mental struggle and artistic output: Would the subject have continued to pursue music, excelling in his original field, or was the shift to poetry—where neurosis thrives—a necessary outcome of his anxious nature? More broadly, the poem reflects on how the mind's inner turmoil, while often seen as a hindrance, can sometimes be channeled into creative productivity in unexpected ways. This tension between anxiety as both a barrier and a catalyst for creativity is central to the poem’s thematic exploration.
In essence, What If He Had Known About Beta Blockers? engages with the idea that creative expression can arise from the very mental obstacles that seem to stand in the way. By highlighting the shift from music to poetry, the poem suggests that anxiety may not be an entirely negative force but rather a complex one that, when harnessed, can lead to profound artistic output in different forms.
performance anxiety, beta blockers, creative expression, neurosis in art, flow states, saxophone brilliance, poetry as escape, mental struggle, artistic productivity, jazz improvisation, anxiety and creativity, shift from music to poetry.
With Her Jaw Still Wired Shut
With Her Jaw Still Wired Shut presents a psychologically rich and unsettling exploration of power, predation, and familial misunderstanding. At its core, the poem delves into the tragic dynamics of a mother-son relationship, where maternal intuition collides with darker instincts within her son. The title itself, invoking the image of a jaw wired shut, suggests the aftermath of violence or trauma, perhaps even a long-standing silence or inability to communicate openly. This physical restraint may symbolize both the literal inability to speak and the figurative suppression of the truths lying beneath the surface of their relationship.
The poem begins with the mother’s belief that she has detected a crack in her son’s seemingly impenetrable facade—a “don’t-fuck-with-me slouch.” Her intuition, however, is guided by a wishful radar, hinting at her desire to connect with him emotionally, despite the warning signs. This "radar" suggests a heightened maternal sensitivity, attuned to her son's emotional needs, but here it is tragically misguided. She perceives the possibility of vulnerability in her son, a need for care that compels her to move closer, attempting to bridge the gap between them.
However, her approach—driven by love and concern—proves to be fatal in more ways than one. The moment of violence, when "a pen pierced her temple as she leaned in," represents not only a literal attack but also a symbolic rebuff of her emotional overture. The pen, typically an instrument of communication, becomes a weapon that severs rather than connects. This act of violence is a rejection of her attempt to provide comfort or contact. The son's reaction reveals a deeper, darker truth about his internal world—one where predatory instincts take precedence over vulnerability or emotional connection. The use of the pen also symbolizes the son's attempt to write his own narrative of control, with violence as the ink that marks his boundary.
The metaphor of the "sated-lion warmth" within the son is crucial to understanding the predator-prey dynamic at play. While the mother’s instinct was to provide nurture and empathy, the son’s inner state is aligned with that of a predator who has successfully made his kill. The "purring" warmth inside him is not one of relief or comfort but of satisfaction from having asserted his dominance. This predatory satisfaction suggests that he has achieved a kind of victory, having neutralized what he perceives as a threat—his mother's emotional closeness. The use of animal imagery reinforces this dynamic: the son as a lion, sated after a kill, and the mother as prey who has misjudged her place in this primal hierarchy.
The tragic irony of the poem lies in the mother’s conviction that she was "correct" in her intuition about her son’s emotional needs. She is indeed correct in sensing that he needed something, but what he required was not the emotional comfort she sought to provide. Rather, he needed the assertion of his predatory instincts, a reestablishment of control, and the satisfaction of his darker, more violent impulses. The poem’s final lines, where the mother’s inability to feel "that sated-lion warmth" blinds her to the true nature of their exchange, underscores the tragedy. She is correct in one sense, but she has failed to recognize the full complexity of his emotional state, particularly the dangerous undercurrents of his predatory desires.
The poem explores themes of violence, miscommunication, and the darker instincts that can lie beneath familial relationships. The mother’s compassion and desire for emotional connection are pitted against the son’s need for control, which manifests through violence. This tension between nurture and dominance, between maternal care and predatory assertion, forms the crux of the poem. In its final analysis, With Her Jaw Still Wired Shut serves as a meditation on the ways in which familial love can be tragically misdirected, especially when darker, unspoken needs and instincts are at play. The poem’s exploration of power dynamics within the family highlights the painful reality that not all emotional needs are met with compassion—sometimes, they are met with violence.
predatory instincts, familial violence, mother-son relationship, power dynamics, miscommunication, maternal compassion, emotional dominance, predator-prey dynamic, animal imagery, tragedy of misreading, familial conflict.
In the Non-Castle-Doctrine State
"In the Non-Castle-Doctrine State" explores the surreal and paradoxical dimensions of legal and social systems that prioritize the rights of criminals over the rights of homeowners. The poem critiques the absurdity of a burglar’s lawsuit for cranial trauma sustained during a robbery, highlighting how societal and legal constructs are manipulated to such an extent that those committing a crime are portrayed as victims of circumstance. The title itself, referencing the “Non-Castle-Doctrine” state, situates the poem in a context where self-defense laws are weaker, underscoring the vulnerability of the homeowner. The poem’s depiction of a world where burglars can sue their victims reflects the disorienting inversion of justice, where personal property and safety are subverted by legal loopholes and cultural justifications.
The reference to the 8k TV, with its technical specificity—Micro-LED, high street value—serves as a symbol of modern consumerism and the social inequalities it both represents and exacerbates. The racial dynamics invoked by the phrase "BIPOC" (Black, Indigenous, and People of Color) further complicate the ethical and legal landscape, suggesting that even the act of stealing is framed within a narrative of historical and systemic oppression, thus rendering it "equitably expected." The “audacious” flaunting of luxury through “arrogant bay windows” suggests a critique of both capitalism and the ostentatious display of wealth in a society where economic disparity fuels moral ambiguity.
The poem critiques not only the inversion of morality in legal terms but also questions the broader societal structures that facilitate this inversion. The contrast between the street value of the TV and the legal rhetoric used to justify criminal behavior points to a deeper conversation about race, class, and privilege. Through the absurdity of the lawsuit, the poem reflects a cultural moment where justice is mediated by identity and economics, and where accountability is obscured by a hyper-awareness of historical injustices.
Ultimately, "In the Non-Castle-Doctrine State" forces readers to confront the uncomfortable intersection of wealth, race, and legal protection, using irony and satire to expose the cracks in societal systems that both privilege and marginalize individuals depending on their position within these structures.
castle doctrine, self-defense laws, legal absurdity, burglary lawsuit, racial dynamics, economic inequality, social justice critique, consumerism, modern justice systems, capitalism critique.
Are All the Muses Cats?
"Are All the Muses Cats?" explores the tension between creative inspiration and the self-consciousness that can interrupt its flow. The poem presents a moment of hesitation: the speaker wishes to record a fleeting moment of creative magic but fears that any attempt to capture it will disrupt the delicate balance required for artistic expression. The muse, often represented as an elusive force in artistic traditions, is here likened to a cat—independent, unbothered by human concerns, and easily scared off by overt efforts to control or pin it down. The speaker’s internal struggle mirrors the creative process itself, where inspiration can be as fragile and fickle as a cat, slipping away when sought too eagerly.
The trek "downstairs" becomes a metaphor for the peril of overthinking or trying too hard, with the speaker recognizing the risk of losing the trance-like state that fosters creativity. The poem reflects on how the ego can intrude upon artistic work, turning the search for inspiration into a "muse-dissing parade," a self-centered performance rather than a pure, intuitive act. The mention of being "uncalibrated to the trance" suggests a loss of the natural rhythm that allows creativity to flow unimpeded, and the speaker's fear of exile from this state highlights the fragility of creative moments. The poem captures the precariousness of the artist’s mind, always aware that overanalysis and the desire to memorialize can sabotage the very magic they seek to immortalize.
The poem thus reflects the timeless artist's dilemma: the fear that in trying to capture or commodify inspiration, the artist may destroy the very thing they wish to preserve. The fleeting, almost mystical nature of creativity is at the heart of this poem, where the muse—like a cat—demands respect for its autonomy, unwilling to be caged or commanded at will.
creativity, inspiration, muses, artistic process, self-consciousness, ego, creative trance, fleeting moments, creative exile, artistic struggle, capturing creativity.
Supplicant
"Supplicant" captures the desperation of addiction, using the imagery of a fleeting, mistaken hope to highlight the depth of the speaker's psychological and physical thirst for relief. The poem opens with a scene of vulnerability: the subject is "on all fours," symbolizing a posture of both physical weakness and spiritual supplication. The fleck of perlite—a seemingly innocuous byproduct from tending to her pothos plant—becomes a powerful metaphor for the irrational yet overwhelming compulsion to seek solace in substances. Despite knowing it is "just a fleck of perlite," the subject’s desperation distorts reality, causing her to mistake it for "what she needed." The act of smoking it, though irrational, becomes a poignant expression of the lengths to which addiction drives individuals, highlighting the delusions that accompany both physical cravings and mental anguish.
The poem then deepens this sense of delusion by invoking the metaphor of a "castaway" succumbing to "the sea's false embrace." This metaphor powerfully conveys the theme of addiction as a cycle of self-destruction, where even those who "know better" are drawn back to harmful behaviors. The "psychosis of thirst" likens the addict's compulsion to the irrational behavior of someone lost at sea, kissing the saltwater that they know cannot quench their thirst, but whose allure is too strong to resist. This image emphasizes the tragic irony of addiction: the false hope that something inherently harmful will provide the relief that is so desperately sought.
The poem, though brief, explores the interplay of rationality and compulsion in addiction, revealing the tragic futility of seeking solace in false sources of comfort. "Supplicant" touches on the themes of vulnerability, delusion, and the cyclical nature of addiction, offering a stark meditation on the ways in which desperation can cloud judgment and drive individuals to self-destruction, even when they are fully aware of the futility of their actions.
addiction, desperation, compulsion, delusion, vulnerability, supplication, psychosis, false hope, substance abuse, self-destruction, craving, irrational behavior, castaway metaphor, addiction cycle.
Tough Love
"Tough Love" presents a poignant reflection on the artist's fraught relationship with their creations, exploring the emotional toll of the creative process. The imagery of the artist’s works "suckling" him, likened to "starved kittens," introduces a dynamic of dependency and need, where the creations are portrayed as endlessly clamoring for attention and refinement. This metaphor suggests that the artist feels both responsible for and exhausted by their creations, as if they are not just works of art, but living beings demanding sustenance. The use of "evermore revision" emphasizes the perpetual nature of this struggle, where the drive for perfection traps the artist in an ongoing loop of dissatisfaction.
The poem's central tension lies in the artist’s fight to move on from these creations, a process compared to the impossibility of getting "pine sap off the palms." The comparison suggests that the attachment to the work is sticky and persistent, not easily shed, and its "infuriation" builds over time. This frustration, while painful, serves a dual purpose: it creates the emotional distance needed for the artist to finally let go. The concluding image of abandoning the works on "cold public steps" carries a sense of bittersweet resolution. The public setting symbolizes the release of these creations into the world, where they are no longer the artist’s sole burden, but now stand vulnerable, exposed, and perhaps neglected. The artist’s choice to desert them, while described as "heartrending," also feels necessary—a form of "tough love" where letting go is an act of survival.
Ultimately, the poem grapples with the paradox of creation: the simultaneous love and frustration that binds the artist to their work, and the painful but crucial act of letting go. In the end, "Tough Love" illustrates the emotional complexity of artistic detachment, where abandoning one’s work is not just a relief, but also a wound.
artistic process, revision, detachment, creative struggle, abandonment, artist's burden, emotional complexity, creation dependency, artistic frustration, tough love, letting go.
MADE FOR YOU AND ME 2: hive Being (Stanzas 2017--part 42)
This compilation of fragmented musings and observations draws upon various aspects of contemporary life, touching on the human condition, societal values, and the often absurd or grotesque ways we confront mortality, identity, and interpersonal relationships. Each vignette, while brief, offers a glimpse into a range of experiences, from addiction and self-destruction to social and existential commentary. The poems move between personal and collective reflections, revealing the complexities of human psychology, the tensions between societal expectations, and the inner workings of individuals who struggle with the realities of existence.
The recurring motif of addiction, both in its literal and metaphorical forms, is one of the central themes of the piece. Addiction is not limited to substances but extends to self-perception, identity formation, and the ways we navigate societal roles. Lines such as "no longer able to tell herself with any shred of persuasion that she can quit" illustrate the overwhelming sense of inevitability in the face of addiction's grip. There is also a clear critique of societal norms and institutions, as seen in references to "self-help books" and "curated digital identities," pointing to the artificiality and performance required to maintain a semblance of order in chaotic lives.
The use of humor and irony throughout the text serves as a coping mechanism, a way to mitigate the harshness of the observations made. For instance, the line about "organic panhandler conventions under night overpasses" reflects a satirical take on identity politics and societal shifts in discourse around gender and social justice. Similarly, the commentary on religion and belief, such as the claim that a "God who prioritizes belief over good deeds is a false god," underlines the inherent contradictions in certain theological or ideological stances. The poems oscillate between bleak existential truths and moments of dark humor, reflecting a nuanced understanding of both despair and resilience.
Themes of isolation and connection also pervade the work. The desire for belonging, whether in familial relationships, romantic partnerships, or within societal constructs, is palpable. Yet, the poems frequently reveal the fragility and failure of these connections, emphasizing the alienation that accompanies modern life. The “boredom displayed by a child,” or the laughter at "pathetic lunges at significance," points to an overarching sense of disillusionment and the search for meaning in a world that offers no easy answers.
Ultimately, this compilation of insights reflects on the contradictions and complexities of human experience. It exposes the insecurities, addictions, and absurdities of life, while also acknowledging the yearning for connection, meaning, and significance. In its fragmented and often disjointed form, the text mirrors the disarray of the lives it portrays, leaving the reader with a sense of both unease and recognition.
addiction, societal norms, alienation, existentialism, identity formation, human condition, satire, dark humor, religion, self-deception, modern life, isolation, interpersonal relationships, addiction recovery, societal critique.
Beatitude
"Beatitude" explores the intersection of addiction recovery, self-deception, and the allure of spiritual transformation. The poem addresses an individual newly sober, less than "thirty-six hours" into recovery, yet already slipping into familiar delusions of grandeur. The title, "Beatitude," evokes notions of blessedness and spiritual elevation, contrasting sharply with the reality of the subject’s fragile sobriety. The speaker’s tone carries a mix of irony and frustration, challenging the individual's tendency to leap prematurely into self-righteousness or spiritual enlightenment.
The poem critically examines the pitfalls of early recovery, where a sense of newfound clarity can easily morph into a kind of self-congratulatory delusion. The reference to “the path of total self-surrender” suggests that the subject has embraced a recovery philosophy—likely rooted in spiritual or religious language—meant to facilitate humility and acceptance. However, the speaker questions the sincerity or depth of this commitment, highlighting how quickly the individual reverts to "delusion's preachy playbook." This phrase captures the tendency to replace one form of escapism (substance use) with another (self-aggrandizing spirituality), suggesting that the underlying issues remain unaddressed.
The second half of the poem shifts to the internalized, self-flattering thoughts that characterize the subject’s mindset. The notion of being "a saint, albeit one... in utero" illustrates the paradox of this false humility: the individual sees themselves as on a sacred path, yet acknowledges (though perhaps disingenuously) that they are still in the early stages. The metaphor of being "in utero" underscores the naivety and premature nature of such self-perception, pointing to a desire for sanctification without enduring the necessary trials of self-reflection and sustained effort.
"Beatitude" ultimately critiques the tendency to embrace spiritual narratives prematurely in the process of recovery, revealing how these narratives can serve as a new form of denial. The poem exposes the tension between the genuine desire for self-transformation and the ease with which the ego distorts that desire into self-glorification, even as the journey has only just begun.
sobriety, recovery, spirituality, delusion, self-surrender, false humility, addiction, self-deception, early recovery, spiritual transformation, ego, denial, self-reflection, beatitude, sanctity.
Tree City Tattoo
"Tree City Tattoo" navigates themes of memory, grief, and male camaraderie through the lens of a shared experience in getting a tattoo. The poem depicts the speaker's reflection on a tattoo that, unbeknownst to him at the time, becomes a significant marker of both a personal and communal history. It explores the way objects and experiences, such as tattoos, serve as anchors for memories, not only of events themselves but also of the people involved—especially those lost to death or addiction. The poem intertwines the ritual of tattooing with notions of mortality, particularly when referencing the "pre-fentanyl days," alluding to the opioid crisis and its tragic consequences for the speaker's cousins.
The poem’s tone fluctuates between dark humor and melancholic introspection. The speaker recalls how, during the session, the tension and inadequacy of the tattoo process—symbolized by Dave’s unreliable tattoo gun—reflect the shaky foundation of their relationships. The group dynamic is sketched through the speaker’s uneasy awareness of the bickering and botched tattoo, suggesting that the superficial act of getting inked belies deeper fractures in their connections. The speaker’s paranoia about the tattoo’s quality morphs into a larger sense of insecurity and disbelief, culminating in his “nonchalance” upon confronting the final product in the mirror. His forced reaction—“Shit look dope!”—becomes a gesture not just of self-deception but also of solidarity, as he spares his friends the embarrassment or guilt they may feel over the outcome.
Time, however, brings perspective. The speaker grows able to laugh about the experience in retrospect, recognizing the botched tattoo as an emblem of the imperfections in their lives, their bonds, and their mortality. The reference to "beach seasons later" evokes a passing of time that allows for healing, yet the losses of his cousins Randy and Matt—presumably to addiction, as hinted by the reference to fentanyl—create an enduring undercurrent of sorrow. The final interaction with Dave, now at Randy or Matt’s funeral, encapsulates the poem’s meditation on how the past continues to ripple through the present. The tattoo, initially a casual endeavor, becomes a symbolic relic of lives intertwined by both laughter and tragedy.
Ultimately, "Tree City Tattoo" juxtaposes the ritual of a tattoo—permanent in ink but fading over time—with the fragility of life and relationships. The tattoo’s significance grows as the people involved in its creation are lost to time, and the speaker’s final reflection on whether the tattoo still exists mirrors the uncertainty of memory, survival, and the legacies we leave behind.
tattoo, memory, mortality, opioid crisis, fentanyl, male camaraderie, loss, grief, bickering, ritual, permanence, imperfection, reflection, funeral, shared experience, legacies, nostalgia.
Forever 27
"Forever 27" reflects on the destructive mythos of rock stardom, often characterized by the tragic deaths of young musicians at the age of 27, such as Jimi Hendrix, Janis Joplin, Kurt Cobain, and Amy Winehouse. The poem delves into themes of youthful immortality, the consequences of impulsive decisions, and the inescapable void that awaits. The title itself is a direct allusion to the "27 Club," the cultural phenomenon surrounding the numerous rock stars who died at that fateful age, suggesting that the subject of the poem is one who lives recklessly, without the foresight to realize the consequences of his actions.
The opening lines present a figure who lacks the ability to "focus empathic eyes to the future," indicating a psychological and emotional blindness. The use of the word "empathic" suggests that this is not just a failure to look ahead for personal reasons but an inability to connect with the future consequences of his actions on others. The poem positions this inability as tragic, especially when set against the backdrop of "rock’n’roll," a genre long associated with rebellion, excess, and the rejection of conventional responsibilities.
The poem highlights the physical symbol of this recklessness in the form of a "neck tat of a girl's name, 'Q'Riah,'" which carries career-destroying implications. The neck tattoo serves as a concrete manifestation of impulsiveness and disregard for the consequences. In the music industry, particularly in rock’n’roll, such a tattoo may be seen as an act of defiance or branding, yet here it is framed as "career-cremating," linking it to a self-destructive act that burns bridges rather than builds them.
The poem then shifts its gaze to the future—or more precisely, the absence of one. The speaker seems to struggle to "focus empathic eyes" not just on his career but on the "void" racing toward him. This void represents both the physical inevitability of death and the psychic burden of regrets that accumulate over a life lived too fast. The "void" is depicted as a force that has "long proven psychic iodine to regret radiation." This metaphor suggests that, just as iodine protects against radiation exposure, the looming void dulls the burn of regret. In this way, the poem illustrates the paradoxical relationship between living with abandon and the underlying awareness of mortality: the character is simultaneously drawn to and numbed by his impending demise, as if the thrill of danger acts as a shield against confronting his mistakes.
Ultimately, the poem engages with the trope of the doomed artist, whose refusal to acknowledge the long-term ramifications of his actions leads him down a path of inevitable self-destruction. The imagery of tattoos, rock’n’roll, and the "racing" void conjure a world where time is compressed and actions are irreversible. In this world, youthful mistakes become permanent scars, both literally and metaphorically, with the figure in the poem embodying the perpetual present of someone who will never grow old—who remains, in the cultural imagination, "forever 27."
The tension between fleeting fame and eternal regret, between the rush of reckless choices and the inescapable approach of the void, makes "Forever 27" a meditation on the dangers of living solely for the moment without regard for the future. It serves as a cautionary tale of a life arrested at the peak of its wildness, where the inability to "focus" on anything beyond the now ultimately seals one's fate.
27 Club, rock’n’roll myth, impulsiveness, mortality, regret, neck tattoo, doomed artist, rock stardom, youthful immortality, self-destruction, racing void, psychic numbing, cultural myth, rebellion, career-ending decisions.
Hum of the Horcruxes
"Hum of the Horcruxes" captures the haunting and paradoxical pursuit of immortality and significance through material possessions, invoking the concept of Horcruxes from J.K. Rowling's Harry Potter series as a metaphor. In Rowling’s mythology, a Horcrux is a dark object into which a fragment of a person’s soul is stored, often accompanied by a loss of humanity. The poem transforms this idea into a symbol of the modern human's desperate attempt to find meaning through the accumulation of curated objects—faceted gems and mint coins—that, although valuable, ultimately fail to fill the void of loneliness and insignificance.
The poem begins by describing "whisper-thin solitude" against the backdrop of someone laying out their precious possessions, an act that is presented as both meticulous and hollow. The choice of words—"curated hoards" and "just because"—emphasizes the empty ritualism behind this behavior. It is as if the person is attempting to create meaning or permanence in an impermanent world, much like how Voldemort created Horcruxes to escape death. Yet the poem immediately undercuts this with a tone of existential resignation. The treasures are spread out on an "unrumpled bed" and an "unsmudged desk," symbols of an unblemished but lifeless existence. The possessions are perfectly preserved, yet they lack the messiness of real life, symbolizing detachment and sterility rather than vitality.
The second stanza asks the reader how such an "emptiness"—born out of this sterile attempt at mattering—could fail to shriek at unbearable decibels. Here, the poem suggests that the person’s act of laying out material objects is an attempt to stage significance or a "lunge at mattering," yet this very act betrays the futility of such efforts. The "noose-dangling decibels" allude to a kind of metaphorical self-destruction, where the realization of the inherent meaninglessness of material accumulation becomes suffocating and unbearable. The imagery of a noose introduces an ominous suggestion of despair, where the pursuit of material significance leads not to satisfaction but to a deeper confrontation with one's insignificance.
By framing this confrontation within the concept of Horcruxes, the poem engages with themes of soul fragmentation and the moral cost of attempting to preserve oneself through external means. The act of spreading out these objects, like creating Horcruxes, is a desperate attempt to anchor oneself in the world, to resist death, decay, and the passage of time. Yet this attempt only amplifies the hum of emptiness, the sense that no matter how much one accumulates or preserves, true significance cannot be bought or curated. This tension between materialism and existential despair is intensified by the poem's juxtaposition of silence (the "whisper-thin solitude") with the loud, violent noise implied by the "noose-dangling decibels."
In exploring these themes, the poem touches on broader existential questions about the nature of meaning, the pursuit of legacy, and the human desire to transcend mortality. The allusion to Horcruxes suggests that the pursuit of permanence through material means comes at a spiritual cost, fragmenting one's sense of self rather than fulfilling it. The poem thus offers a critique of materialism and the modern obsession with possession as a substitute for genuine connection and purpose, implying that such efforts are ultimately self-destructive.
Horcruxes, materialism, existential crisis, immortality, J.K. Rowling, Harry Potter, curated possessions, modern loneliness, futility of legacy, soul fragmentation, existential despair, noose symbolism, mortality, self-destruction, accumulation and meaning.
Mesozoic Playback Settings
"Mesozoic Playback Settings" is a poem that uses the metaphor of viewing pornography at triple speed to explore the remnants of our primordial, rodent-like instincts. The poem opens with the seemingly mundane yet frenetic image of "mouse squeaks on mute" and the fast-forwarding of pornographic content, establishing an unexpected juxtaposition between modern behavior and ancient evolutionary history. This deliberate use of pornographic imagery—especially at accelerated speed—serves to amplify the frenetic, animalistic nature of desire, subtly suggesting that beneath our sophisticated technological behaviors lie traces of primal instincts dating back millions of years.
The poem invokes the "rodent-whiskered roots" and "quivering-shrew core," calling attention to the distant evolutionary past, particularly the Mesozoic era when early mammals scurried for survival in a world dominated by dinosaurs. The phrase "mucosal catfish glinting out from Lethe’s inky mud" brilliantly connects this primal past to the present, invoking the Greek mythological concept of Lethe, the river of forgetfulness, to symbolize how these deep, evolutionary memories are often concealed but can resurface in unexpected ways. The catfish, a creature known for bottom-feeding and lurking in the depths, represents how these primitive urges emerge from the unconscious "mud" of our collective psyche when provoked by certain stimuli, like the fast-paced consumption of sexual imagery.
By focusing on this buried, "quivering-shrew core," the poem situates contemporary behaviors within the broader context of our evolutionary past, reminding us that modern actions—often perceived as distinctly human—are deeply intertwined with the survival mechanisms of ancient mammalian ancestors. These creatures, who once darted across the surface during the reign of dinosaurs, were hyper-aware of their vulnerability, living in constant fear of predators. The mention of these instincts highlights the persistent influence of fear, desire, and survival that continues to pulse beneath the veneer of modern civilization. Even in seemingly detached, impersonal moments of media consumption, the poem suggests that we are still tethered to our evolutionary heritage.
The poem's layered use of metaphors—"mouse squeaks," "rodent-whiskered roots," and "quivering-shrew core"—invites a deeper reflection on the connection between instinct and technology. While technology allows us to mute or fast-forward aspects of our experience, our primal nature is not so easily subdued. The poem contends that even as we engage with contemporary media, there is a cyclical replay of ancient behaviors, memories, and instincts, suggesting that modernity is not so much a break from the past as a new setting for the same ancient narratives to play out.
Ultimately, "Mesozoic Playback Settings" offers a profound meditation on the continuity of life across millennia. It blurs the line between the distant past and the present moment, reminding us that beneath the layers of culture, technology, and rational thought, our primitive selves continue to linger, subtly shaping our behaviors, desires, and fears. By invoking the imagery of the Mesozoic era and combining it with modern media practices, the poem highlights how our evolutionary roots remain ever-present, even in the most unexpected contexts.
evolutionary psychology, Mesozoic era, pornography, primal instincts, rodent roots, ancient instincts, Lethe, unconscious memory, modern media, human behavior, evolutionary continuity, survival mechanisms, technology and instinct, Greek mythology, ancient mammals, human nature.
Realistic Silver Linings
The poem "Realistic Silver Linings" offers a provocative exploration of the cultural and psychological impact of exposure to trans individuals in public spaces, particularly focusing on how societal perceptions of the penis—and male sexuality more broadly—are shaped by Western taboos and anxieties. The poem begins by reframing the contentious issue of trans women using female restrooms as an "upshot," suggesting a potential positive outcome from an otherwise controversial situation. It positions the exposure of young girls to transgender individuals as a possible catalyst for demystifying the penis, an organ that, in Western culture, has long carried an outsized symbolic weight tied to power, dominance, and fear.
The poem critiques the "Western magic" surrounding the penis, a phrase loaded with irony, as it calls attention to the way male sexuality has been overinflated to the point of near-absurdity in modern discourse. In lines such as “its piddly pulses on your subway leg” and “just its zipper wink,” the poem addresses the subtle but pervasive presence of male genitalia in public spaces and the often exaggerated reactions to these fleeting encounters. These moments, seemingly insignificant, are described as having the power to "spell lifelong therapy"—an indictment of how Western culture has pathologized these interactions and turned them into sources of trauma.
In contrast to this psychological baggage, the poem invokes the image of tribespeople who, by comparison, possess a more grounded and less neurotic relationship with sexuality. Their indifference to the penis is likened to their well-adjusted gut flora—symbolizing a natural, untroubled integration of bodily functions and experiences. The implication is that exposure to transgender individuals in restrooms might help to neutralize the intense emotions and psychological distress often associated with the penis in the Western mind. The poem gestures toward the possibility of a cultural shift where the penis is no longer a totem of danger or trauma but something that can be laughed off as insignificant.
The poem suggests that this exposure may lead to a broader social liberation from the "Western magic" of the penis—specifically, the power it holds over women's psyches in certain cultures. The idea of being "freed" to laugh at it as the tribespeople do points to a desired future where the penis loses its threatening, almost mythic status and becomes just another part of the human body. This "realistic silver lining" reflects the speaker's hope that, through increased exposure and desensitization, we might achieve a healthier, less fraught relationship with male genitalia and, by extension, with male sexuality itself.
However, the poem also raises questions about whether this desired cultural shift is achievable or desirable. While the poem presents a hopeful vision of cultural desensitization, it also hints at the deep-seated complexities of this issue. The penis in Western culture has been so thoroughly imbued with layers of meaning—danger, power, vulnerability, and taboo—that achieving the kind of casual indifference the speaker imagines may be far more difficult than it seems. In this way, the poem straddles the line between satire and genuine aspiration, offering a complex meditation on gender, sexuality, and the power of cultural symbols.
Western magic, trans individuals, public restrooms, male sexuality, cultural taboos, gender dynamics, psychological trauma, societal perceptions, desensitization, transgender issues, sexual symbolism, tribal societies, cultural critique, gender relations, body politics.
Cast the First Stone
The poem "Cast the First Stone" is a pointed critique of moral hypocrisy and the ease with which individuals claim a higher ground while conveniently forgetting their own past compliance with societal pressures. Addressed to those who claim they would resist contemporary moral trends, the poem holds a mirror to those same individuals, reminding them that they were once themselves eager to fit in, as symbolized by their desire to wear Jordans. The rhetorical move here is to question the reader's ability to truly stand apart from peer pressure, particularly when it comes to controversial and rapidly shifting social norms—namely, the use of new pronouns and the policing of language in educational settings.
The poem juxtaposes two periods of social conformity: the speaker recalls a time when wearing Jordans was a near-necessity for acceptance in school, subtly underlining how even minor acts of conformity can be driven by immense social pressures. This detail is not arbitrary; it calls into question the reader’s potential to stand up to much more intense social dynamics, like those faced by today’s youth navigating issues of gender identity. The poem draws attention to a new kind of conformity that exists under the guise of personal empowerment but is deeply embedded in a trend-driven culture where the stakes are much higher—this time involving the life-altering decisions of transitioning and gender identity politics. The question the poem raises is not just about whether one would resist these trends today, but whether anyone really has the strength to stand against the tide when conformity is woven into the fabric of adolescence and peer identity.
The reference to making teachers "dance to your newfangled pronouns" evokes a specific contemporary anxiety about the power dynamics in classrooms, where students wield unprecedented influence over language and behavior. The poem highlights the extent to which these power dynamics can feel coercive to those in authority, often involving threats of being labeled transphobic or politically incorrect. But the poem is more than a critique of these students; it is a critique of those who believe they are somehow immune to these dynamics—those who claim they would resist the pressure to conform to pronoun usage but fail to realize how often they themselves conformed to similarly arbitrary social markers, like brand-name shoes.
In drawing this parallel between the past and the present, the poem suggests that no one is truly above the pressures of conformity. The same individuals who so adamantly wore Jordans in their youth would likely have succumbed to the same pressures faced by today's adolescents. The reference to puberty blockers and "glitter scalpels" makes the stakes of this new conformity more visceral: while past acts of conformity might have seemed trivial, today's pressures involve body-altering, life-changing decisions. The poem asks: would these moral critics have resisted the "bully temptation" to make their teachers comply with pronoun usage, or would they have fallen in line, just as they did with fashion trends?
The poem raises important questions about the nature of social influence, power dynamics, and moral conviction. It reminds us that, regardless of the time or issue, peer pressure has a powerful way of compelling compliance. The concluding rhetorical question—whether the reader truly believes they would have resisted—challenges the reader to confront their own history of conformity and question the strength of their convictions in the face of real-world pressure.
The poem "Cast the First Stone" critiques moral hypocrisy by drawing a parallel between past and present forms of social conformity. It challenges those who believe they would resist current trends, such as the use of pronouns in schools, by reminding them of their own compliance with peer pressures in the past, like the compulsion to wear Jordans. Through this comparison, the poem explores the complexities of peer influence and the illusion of moral superiority, ultimately questioning whether anyone can truly stand apart from societal pressures.
Social conformity, peer pressure, moral hypocrisy, pronouns in schools, gender identity, societal trends, adolescence, power dynamics, contemporary issues, personal empowerment, puberty blockers, body autonomy, moral critique, social trends, classroom authority.
MADE FOR YOU AND ME 2: hive Being (Stanzas 2017--part 41)
The poem presents a vivid kaleidoscope of modern societal contradictions, emotional dissonance, and the conflicts between individual identity and communal expectations. Themes such as race, performance, addiction, and the human desire for permanence or stability are skillfully interwoven into seemingly fragmented but symbolically rich scenarios. The poem draws attention to the complex and often paradoxical relationships individuals have with societal structures, social media, and themselves.
The line "united in that we are shrieking" sets the tone for the entire poem: we are bound not by shared experiences or values, but by the intensity of our individual outcries, manifesting as a collective existential scream. From this framework, the subsequent lines explore how personal crises and social performativity entwine with identity and power dynamics. The reference to Veruca-Salt types highlights how false accusations can carry racial connotations, alluding to historical and racial tensions surrounding white women accusing black men of crimes they did not commit, an implicit critique of racial and gendered power imbalances.
The poem then shifts to the theme of identity construction through external validation and perception. The juxtaposition between personal self-grooming before an interview and the absurd extremes of celebrity cosmetic surgeries illustrates the fragility of self-perception in the face of societal pressures. The idea that social media breaks, themselves performative acts, become exaggerated as forms of integrity, underscores the tension between authenticity and the demands of public persona.
Further, the exploration of addiction is portrayed through the metaphor of superposition—mirroring quantum states where an addict balances between functional and dysfunctional behaviors until observed, which collapses these possibilities into a singular, tragic outcome. The reference to "slam poetry performances of charlatan Afrocentrism" critiques how certain movements that seek to resist white supremacy can become commodified, using easy slogans and hollow rhetoric to appeal to audiences rather than truly challenge systemic issues.
The depiction of the shopping-cart man suggests the blurred line between reality and performance in the lives of those on the margins of society. Similarly, the imagery of police shielding a black person's head as they arrest them juxtaposes a moment of humanity against the broader context of systemic violence, forcing readers to confront the contradictions of power.
In one of the most intimate moments of the poem, the parental figure attending their daughter's ballet recital for the first time wrestles with the realization that personal milestones are often overshadowed by the transactional demands of professional life. The poem thus captures a universal struggle between individual fulfillment and the broader societal expectations that threaten to strip it away.
Through a critique of race, class, performance, addiction, and identity, this piece deconstructs the myriad ways people construct, perform, and navigate their lives, often at the intersection of private desires and public roles.
identity performance, societal contradictions, addiction superposition, racial tensions, social media performativity, power dynamics, slam poetry critique, quantum metaphor, parental roles, systemic critique, individual fulfillment
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FAQ
Visit my Substack: Hive Being
Visit my Substack: Hive Being
Don’t let anyone tell you that real life is lacking in poetic interest. This is exactly what the poet is for: he has the mind and the imagination to find something of interest in everyday things. Real life supplies the motifs, the points that need to be said—the actual heart of the matter; but it is the poet’s job to fashion it all into a beautiful, animated whole. You are familiar with Fürnstein, the so-called “nature poet”? He has written a poem about growing hops, and you couldn’t imagine anything nicer. I have now asked him to write some poems celebrating the work of skilled artisans, in particular weavers, and I am quite sure he will succeed; he has lived among such people from an early age, he knows the subject inside out, and will be in full command of his material. That is the advantage of small works: you need only choose subjects that you know and have at your command. With a longer poetic work, however, this is not possible. There is no way around it: all the different threads that tie the whole thing together, and are woven into the design, have to be shown in accurate detail. Young people only have a one-sided view of things, whereas a longer work requires a multiplicity of viewpoints—and that’s where they come unstuck.—Goethe (Conversations with Eckermann)
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